YOU WANT ME TO RUN... A 10K?!
Today was a big deal...
I accomplished a goal I didn't fully believe in, but the fact that I did it anyway, has officially changed the game.
It all started when Eric, my cardio bunny and former Track Team-loving Biscuit, told me he signed us up for the Orca Running Club Social Distance 10k two months ago. I thought he'd totally lost his mind... I mean, I'd never even run a damned 5k, let alone a 10!
Because even though I'd always secretly wanted to be a runner, I never thought it was actually a possibility for me.
I assumed running was reserved for people built like baby birds or those who never felt pain. Me on the other hand? I feel pain every day and my poor legs have taken quite the beating over the years! I've told myself story after story of all the reasons I can't be a runner and just recently discovered one I was sure would bring me down. Lyme Disease is quite the buzz kill after all.
But I decided to try it anyway... Whether it was because of my desperation to get out of the house or the fact that it brought Eric and I closer together, I knew this was something I needed to try, rather than shoot it down once again. And throughout the training process, I was all over the place!
Some days felt amazing and others were impossible.
If you live on Cap Hill and ever heard a girl yell "I can't do this anymore, I'm a meathead for crying out loud!" I apologize for the disturbance in your window! There were tears, tantrums, and a whole lot of miles walked. Sometimes my legs tolerated the runs well and other times I had to lay down in the shower, but we kept at it week after week. And you're right, Eric is a Saint...
Friday as he planned our route, I told him I didn't think I could make it. We slowed down our training a few weeks ago, as my legs were swelling up and in a ton of pain. I decided I wanted to plan for a 5k at most and let him keep going to finish the 10k on his own. This felt like a great option to me and I didn't feel an ounce of regret about honoring my body and what it needed.
But today was another day. Something shifted inside of me and I decided to just play things by ear. Mile 1 was creaky, Mile 2 was better, and Mile 3 started feeling kind of fun. I found myself loving the weather and the view and realized I wasn't ready to stop at my 5k. So we kept going...
And it felt like my body gave a sigh of relief. I stopped pushing or pressuring her to perform, so she got to live in the moment and do what she wanted to do.
It's amazing how sometimes when we just let go, our bodies actually respond even better than before! Ever notice how your body responds that way too?
Because if this is what letting go looks like, what does that mean for other areas of our lives?
How do we continue to hold ourselves back with our stories?